Discover and read the best of Twitter Threads about #fml

Most recents (6)

I have reached a whole new level of #PISSEDOFF.

I didnt think such a #dark and #scary state, or level, could be reached. It may top 12-14-17's causation. It's. That. Bad. So, I've prepared a statement...

docs.google.com/document/d/1_J…

#PascoSheriff #HaveYouAllNoShame @CigarCityBeer
Dear @FBI,
I must implore you ask your colleauges in @FBITampa to help research this new level of #PISSEDOFFNESS. As locals, they may offer a special indepth knowledge of this new level I have reached. This is not fair & law enforcement must #investigate. No one deserves this.
This is my #apogee of #Pissedoffness.
If #motherfuckers & #tears werent a noticable level.
If #HUSH or #INTIMIDATION tactics being deployed didnt strike a chord.
If #EVIDENCE, PROOF, or 30k Bonds didnt #WOW YOU.
If posting mom with no shred of investigatable value wasnt enough...
Read 463 tweets
Why do -0- Congresscritters know how to efficiently examine and cross-examine witnesses?

Look, I will gladly discount my fee and *come teach y'all* if it will help improve these God-awful spectacles
But that's why they have staff! They could easily higher the Ivy-est of Ivy grads to train them if they cared

That list would take all day 😂

Basically –

Direct Qs: short, starting who / what / when / where / how

Cross Qs: very short, worded so that the only possible answer is "yes" or "no," and phrased in a way that doesn't reaffirm points that hurt your case

Read 18 tweets
I stayed up & did all my work so I can get some much needed rest today & dammit all I want is to find a comfortable position that doesn't make my legs hurt or for the medicine to work or for the muscle relaxer to knock me TF out or for the Biofreeze to work!
#fml #chronicpain
Fuuuuuuccccccck!!!!!!
One of those days that I'm glad I documented my frustrations with falling asleep.

Because now I can project the minimum amount of time I need to stay asleep while the house is quiet.
Read 9 tweets
Want to take your pages to visit a bug farm in IE and Edge?

Put a bunch of stuff above your document's character set declaration:
Alternatively, want to avoid a visit to the bug farm? Put a charset=utf-8 attribute on your Content-Type response header, and put <meta charset=utf-8> as the FIRST line of your <HEAD>.
(When IE/Edge encounter the character set declaration, they must restart the parser from the beginning, interpreting with the declared character set. Beyond hurting perf, this restart process tends to expose bugs.)
Read 4 tweets
Just received the most incredible early birthday present ever from partner-of-the-decade @sowmyarao_ (yes, my love can be bought with the right stuff) 💖💖💖😻😻😻 #OculusRift #MuchExcite
Best thing - this is a 2 part present. One being the Rift itself, the second being the pleasure to be derived from researching and tinkering and rummaging for deals, to find the most cost effective way to power the Rift.
It's going to be a good birthday month 😬

PS: Also shout out to @karthikb351 for being the kuruvi and transporting a package of record proportions. 😘😛
Read 99 tweets

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